What’s not to love?

Television critics never loved “Dallas” – especially in April 1978, when CBS introduced the series as a late-season replacement for “The Carol Burnett Show.”

The New York Times’ John J. O’Connor dismissed “Dallas” as a “daytime soap opera gussied up with on-location Texas settings.” He called the show “enervating” and made the curious observation it offered “innumerable scenes of people getting into, driving or getting out of cars.”

O’Connor also lamented how “the fine stage actress” Barbara Bel Geddes was relegated to “wandering around among the players with about three lines of dialogue,” and he described Charlene Tilton as “sulking sexily through was appears to be an audition for a remake of ‘Baby Doll.’”

According to Barbara A. Curran’s 2005 book “Dallas: The Complete Story of the World’s Favorite Prime-Time Soap,” the Hollywood trade publication Variety assailed “Dallas” as “dull and contrived,” “the TV equivalent of women’s-magazine fiction” and “a limited series with a limited future.”

The Associated Press was a bit kinder, praising CBS for filming “Dallas” in Texas. “[T]he look it gives the show was worth the effort,” wrote the wire service’s critic, who wasn’t given a byline.

This critic also pointed out how “Dallas” was conceived as a star vehicle for “a certain glamorous actress” – Linda Evans, although the review doesn’t name her – and suggested Larry Hagman stole the spotlight from Victoria Principal, who was cast as Pam after Evans was dropped from consideration.

“By far, the meatiest role, at least in the opener, goes to Hagman,” the AP’s critic wrote. “He is deliciously wicked as he attempts to reject Miss Principal from the family bosom by any foul means.”

In the Globe and Mail, a Canadian newspaper, Blaik Kirby declared Hagman “curls a lip better than anyone,” while the Los Angeles Times’ Cecil Smith asserted the actor’s “smiling villainy is the role you remember.”

Smith also praised Jim Davis’s “flinty ferocity,” but the critic bemoaned how “Dallas’s” first episode spent so much time introducing the characters and their backstories “that there isn’t much room for plot.”

Still, Smith saw some promise in the new series.

“[T]he scene is set,” he wrote, “for some very steamy drama to come on the arid Texas plains.”

What did you think of “Dallas” the first time you watched it? Share your thoughts in the comments section below.

Three-way split

Here’s how I know “Dallas’s” opening credits are special: My husband Andrew never fast-forwards through them.

Andrew watches “Dallas” on DVD, which is how he has consumed a lot of other classic television over the years. With those other shows, whether it’s “Star Trek” or “Sex and the City,” Andrew almost never sits through the opening credits. As he puts it, once you’ve heard Captain Kirk explain the Enterprise’s five-year mission or seen Carrie Bradshaw get splashed by that bus, you really don’t need to experience it again.

For Andrew, “Dallas” is different. He says the title sequence is an essential part of the viewing experience because it puts you in the right frame of mind for each episode.

I agree, of course. For my money, “Dallas” title sequence is television’s all-time best. Jerrold Immel’s driving theme music is a huge part of their appeal, but so is the iconic three-way split screen used during most of the show’s run.

The sequence was designed by Wayne Fitzgerald, whose other credits include the opening titles for series such as “Matlock” and “Quincy” and movies like “The Godfather, Part II” and “Chinatown.”

“Dallas” is his masterpiece.

The scenes Fitzgerald chose are perfect because they depict the real-life Dallas in all its contradictory glory. He shows us how the city is big enough to host a major-league football team, but raw enough that tractors still roam its countryside. It’s home to glass skyscrapers and long stretches of highway, but it also has herds of cattle and soggy oil fields.

The three-way split screen is also ideal for the cast shots because it signals how multi-faceted the characters are. The images often change from season to season, but we usually see Linda Gray smiling nicely in one screen, while looking pensive and sultry in the other two. For several seasons, Patrick Duffy is depicted as a shirtless grimacer, a cowboy-hatted yelper and a butterfly-collared worrier.

Larry Hagman is usually all smiles in his screens – which is entirely appropriate, since J.R. grins whether he’s savoring a sweet victory or knifing an enemy in the back – while Victoria Principal’s middle screen is almost always that same shot of her walking across a Southfork pasture wearing a plaid shirt and blue jeans.

“Dallas’s” titles carry other meanings, too. I don’t think it’s a coincidence the shape of each actor’s middle screen suggests the sloped angles of an oil derrick. More obviously, the titles also let the audience know which actors and characters to invest in.

For example, we know it’s time to start paying closer attention to Sue Ellen and Ray when Linda Gray and Steve Kanaly are added to the credits at the beginning of the second season. Similarly, Ken Kercheval – like Gray and Kanaly, a regular from the beginning – finally gets the title-sequence treatment during the third season.

“Dallas” throws viewers for a loop toward the end of its run, when producers abandon the split-screen in favor of a single shots. Ho-hum. Producers also begin adding actors to the credits the moment they arrive on the show. It doesn’t feel like “Dallas.”

TNT apparently hasn’t decided how to handle the opening credits for its new “Dallas” series, which will debut in June. Jason Matheson, a Minneapolis TV and radio host and a huge “Dallas” fan, raised the question on Twitter last week, prompting a debate over whether TNT should revive the sliding split-screen or find a fresh design for the titles.

I’ll respect whatever decision TNT makes, but it would be a lot of fun to see a new version of those iconic titles.

After all, the classic “Dallas” had television’s grandest opening – and that’s not the kind of thing you close the door on lightly.

If the first season of TNT’s “Dallas” taught us anything, it’s this: J.R. Ewing (Larry Hagman) still has a way with words. With “Revelations,” the eagerly awaited season finale two days away, here’s a look back at some of his best lines.

Bullets don’t seem to have much of an effect on him (Photo credit: Mark Seliger/TNT)

• “Son, the courts are for amateurs and the faint of heart.”

Responding to John Ross’s suggestion that he could win a legal fight with Bobby in “Changing of the Guard”

• “Son, never pass up a good chance to shut up.”

Imparting more wisdom to John Ross in “Hedging Your Bets”

• “I hate to hit a man below the belt, but you know I will.”

Threatening Mitch Lobell in “Hedging Your Bets”

• “Time has not been kind to that face.”

Upon seeing Cliff Barnes for the first time in many years in “The Price You Pay”

• “Bullets don’t seem to have much an effect on me, darlin’.”

Greeting a shotgun-wielding Ann in “The Price You Pay”

• “I’m going to tell you the truest thing my daddy ever told me: Nobody gives you power. Real power is something you take.”

Quoting Jock to John Ross in “The Price You Pay”

• “Those people are not passing away because of old age. They’re trying to get away from the food.”

Describing the culinary options at his nursing home in “The Price You Pay”

• “That Mexican girl?”

Describing Elena in “The Last Hurrah”

• “Our girl is crazier than an outhouse rat.”

Describing Marta in “The Last Hurrah”

• “Are you really going to break bread with this lowlife?”

Upon learning Sue Ellen plans to have lunch with Cliff in “The Last Hurrah”

• “Well what fun would I get out of telling you that?”

His response when John Ross asks where he’s going in “Truth and Consequences”

• “For a chance to make money from me, Cliff Barnes would push his mama in a puddle of piranhas.”

Assessing his chances of joining Cliff’s high-stakes poker game in “The Enemy of My Enemy”

• “A cheated man is a dangerous man. Just ask my son.”

Describing Frank Ashkani in “Collateral Damage”

• “OK, I admit, I have lapses where I do wrong now and then.”

Offering Bobby the understatement of a lifetime in “Family Business”

Share your favorite lines from J.R. below. Coming tomorrow: More things Ewings say.

J.R. isn’t the only sharp-tongued Ewing on TNT’s “Dallas.” To help you prepare for tomorrow’s telecast of “Revelations,” the first-season finale, we offer this review of memorable lines from other characters.

Don’t darlin’ her, either (Photo credit: Mark Seliger/TNT)

• “Count your blessings, Christopher. Those two old geezers would still find a reason to fight.”

Lucy (Charlene Tilton), after her cousin announces J.R. and Cliff won’t be able to attend his wedding in “Changing of the Guard”

• “We ain’t family, bro.”

John Ross (Josh Henderson) to Christopher in “Hedging Your Bets”

• “OK, can we just go bake something?”

Rebecca (Julie Gonzalo), after failing to hit the target during shooting practice with Ann in “The Price You Pay”

• “Hair loss isn’t one of them, right?”

Bobby (Patrick Duffy), upon hearing his new medication has side effects in “The Price You Pay”

• “You got your daddy’s charm. Let’s hope you didn’t get his morals.”

Miss Henderson (Margaret Bowman), responding to John Ross’s sweet talk in “The Last Hurrah”

• “He was dyslexic, not stupid.”

Elena (Jordana Brewster), responding to J.R.’s quip about John Ross’s childhood aversion to reading, in “The Last Hurrah”

• “I know all the things Daddy used to say.”

Bobby, after J.R. quotes Jock for the umpteenth time, in “Truth and Consequences”

• “I like your husband. And I always thought his brother was a prick.”

Harris (Mitch Pileggi), agreeing to Ann’s request to help Bobby by cancelling his contract with J.R. in “Truth and Consequences”

• “The people in Texas are way too friendly. It tries my nerves.”

Tommy (Callard Harris) in “The Enemy of My Enemy”

• “What now?”

John Ross, after Bobby and Christopher enter his room in “The Enemy of My Enemy”

• “I’m sorry I threw up in your bathroom.”

Rebecca to Elena in “Collateral Damage”

• “The first thing I thought was, ‘Yep, he’s his mama’s son.’”

Lucy, recalling the time she found John Ross drunk after he broke into the Southfork liquor cabinet as a child, in “Collateral Damage”

• “You’ve been writing more prescriptions than Michael Jackson’s doctor – which is odd, since all of your patients are dead.”

Sue Ellen (Linda Gray), blackmailing a medical examiner in “No Good Deed”

• “If I catch you anywhere near Bobby’s room, I’ll shoot you. And since you have no heart, it’ll be somewhere more vital.”

Ann (Brenda Strong), chasing J.R. away from her ill husband in “Family Business”

Share your favorite lines from TNT’s “Dallas” characters below.

Yes, we’re sure

TNT’s “Dallas” will begin its second season on Monday, January 28. Take this quiz to refresh your memory of Season 1. The correct answers appear at the end.

1. What threesome controls the Southfork mineral rights?

a) J.R., Bobby and Gary

b) J.R., Bobby and Ray

c) John Ross, Christopher and Lucy

d) Jack, Janet and Chrissy

2. What foursome owns Ewing Energies?

a) J.R., Bobby, John Ross and Christopher

b) Bobby, John Ross, Christopher and Elena

c) John Ross, Christopher, Elena and Cliff

d) John Ross, Christopher, Elena and Rebecca

3. Ann secretly recorded ex-husband Harris Ryland confessing to …

a) Counterfeiting

b) Money laundering

c) Murder

d) His commitment to a sanitarium in the early 1990s

Wake up call

4. Christopher was shocked when he answered Tommy’s phone and heard whose voice?

a) John Ross

b) Cliff Barnes

c) Frank Ashkani, Cliff’s henchman

d) Becky Sutter, Tommy’s real sister

5. Christopher’s alternative energy technology relies on what natural resource?

a) Methane hydrate

b) Solar power

c) Wind power

d) Linda Gray’s fountain of youth

6. What did Bobby toss in the fireplace?

a) Ann’s locket

b) The Southfork deed

c) The envelope that Harris gave him

d) The painting hanging above it

7. What did Bobby tell Vicente Cano when he visited Southfork?

a) “Get the hell out of my house!”

b) “Help me put the living room and dining room back where they belong!”

c) “Help me birth this calf!”

d) “Wipe your feet!”

Daughter of the alamo

8. Who is Rebecca’s father?

a) Harris Ryland

b) Carlos del Sol

c) Cliff Barnes

d) Tommy’s Uncle Fred

9. What was the real name of the woman who impersonated Marta del Sol?

a) Andrea Barrett

b) Verna Ellers

c) Veronica Martinez

d) Ben Stivers

10. Why did Marta descend from the high-rise balcony?

a) She thought it would be faster than taking the elevator.

b) She jumped.

c) She was pushed by Vicente’s henchmen.

d) She was spooked by Julie Gray’s ghost.

11. Before he died, Elena’s father worked in what industry?

a) Oil

b) Ranching

c) Trucking

d) Cosmetics

Debt in the family

12. Who loaned Elena the money to buy the Henderson oil leases?

a) Harris Ryland

b) Vicente Cano

c) Franklin Horner

d) Sue Ellen

13. Who is Clyde Marshall?

a) J.R.’s lawyer

b) Bobby’s lawyer

c) John Ross’s private eye

d) The Dallas County sheriff

14. What is the name of the medical examiner that Sue Ellen blackmailed?

a) Dr. Bruce Rasmussen

b) Dr. Varun Rasmussen

c) Dr. Peyton Hayslip

d) Dr. Mitchell Ackerman

15. What is the full name of Patrick Duffy’s character?

a) Bobby James Ewing – and don’t let anyone tell you differently

Answers: 1) a. 2) b. 3) b. 4) d. 5) a. 6) c. 7) a. 8) c. 9) c. 10) c. 11) a. 12) d. 13) c. 14) b. 15) a.

Who are these people?

Stick around after “Dallas” tonight and you’ll see the debut of “Monday Mornings,” a weekly medical drama that – in the words of TNT’s press release – “follows the lives of doctors as they push the limits of their abilities and confront their personal and professional failings.” Back in the ’80s, the post-“Dallas” time slot – Friday nights at 10 – was some of the hottest real estate in prime time. Do you remember the other shows that tried to ride J.R.’s coattails to the top of the Nielsen charts?

“Falcon Crest”

Vintage

Well, of course you remember this one. “Falcon Crest” debuted December 4, 1981, and followed “Dallas” on Friday nights for almost its entire nine-season run. (CBS bumped the show to Thursdays for its final four episodes.) The series starred the great Jane Wyman as the indomitable Angela Channing, who ruled the Northern California wine country the way J.R. ruled Big D. Wyman’s co-stars included Lorenzo Lamas, whose playboy Lance Cumson was the John Ross Ewing of his day. “Falcon Crest” also starred Robert Foxworth, a fine actor who turned down the role of J.R. in 1978 because he feared the character wasn’t likable enough. For this, we thank him.

“Capitol”

Women at war

Wasn’t “Capitol” a daytime soap opera, you ask? Yes it was. But on March 26, 1982, three days before the serial joined CBS’s afternoon lineup (where it was sandwiched between “As the World Turns” and “Guiding Light”), “Capitol” got a one-hour preview after “Dallas.” The show was set in Washington, D.C., and told the story of two families: the McCandlesses and the Cleggs, who fought over politics the way the Barneses and the Ewings feuded over oil. Instead of old coots like Jock and Digger, “Capitol” gave us two grand dames: Constance Towers as Clarissa McCandless and Carolyn Jones – a.k.a. Morticia Addams – as Myrna Clegg. How progressive!

“Knots Landing”

Three’s a crowd, Gary

“Dallas” and “Knots Landing” were made to go together, but the spinoff followed its parent in CBS’s lineup exactly once: October 29, 1982. That evening, Gary (Ted Shackelford) visited “Dallas” for the reading of Jock’s will, and the story continued on a special “Knots Landing” episode in which J.R. (Larry Hagman) canoodled with his middle brother’s latest squeeze Abby (Donna Mills). If CBS’s goal was to goose “Knots Landing’s” numbers, the plan worked: That week, “Dallas” finished first in the ratings and “Knots Landing” finished fourth. It was “Knots Landing’s” most-watched episode ever and the first time the show cracked Nielsen’s top 10.

“The Mississippi”

All wet

When “Falcon Crest” finished its second season early, CBS used the post-“Dallas” time slot to try out “The Mississippi,” which began a six-week run on March 25, 1983. The series starred “The Waltons” dad Ralph Waite as Ben Walker, a tugboat captain who also fought crime with help from sidekick Stella McMullen (Linda G. Miller). “The Mississippi” was an instant hit and earned its own slot on CBS’s fall 1983 schedule: Tuesday nights at 8. But without the benefit of a “Dallas” lead-in, “The Mississippi’s” audience dried up. (Oh, stop groaning. You knew that was coming.) In 1997, Waite appeared on Hagman’s “Orleans,” another CBS riverboats-and-crime drama.

“Hard Copy”

Get them rewrite!

“Hard Copy” starred Michael Murphy as Andy Omart, a scribe for the Los Angeles Morning Post; Wendy Crewson as fellow newshound Blake Calisher; and Dean Devlin as David Del Valle (or was it David Del Valle as Dean Devlin?), a cub reporter. Also featured: George O. Petrie – a.k.a. Ewing family consigliere Harv Smithfield – as Scoop Webster. CBS launched “Hard Copy” after Super Bowl XXI (Giants stomp the Broncos, 39 to 20) in January 1987, where it bombed. In May, the network moved the show to Fridays, where it followed summertime “Dallas” reruns and bombed again. CBS stopped the presses for good six weeks later.

“Beauty and the Beast”

Once upon a time

If you remember “Beauty and the Beast” airing before “Dallas,” you’re right. But before the romantic fantasy/action show moved to the pre-Southfork slot, CBS aired its pilot after “Dallas’s” 11th season premiere on September 25, 1987. You’ll recall that was the night Pam was rescued from her fiery car crash. Perhaps CBS thought seeing Pam wrapped in bandages would help viewers mentally prepare to meet Vincent (Ron Perlman), the lion-like creature who made Catherine Chandler (Linda Hamilton) swoon. Vincent’s face was hidden in all the show’s pre-debut publicity, including TV Guide’s fall preview; the hairy mug wasn’t revealed until the premiere.

“Sons & Daughters”

Circle unbroken?

“Dallas’s” final dance partner, “Sons & Daughters,” debuted January 4, 1991, four months before the Ewings rode off into the sunset. The “Parenthood”-style series starred Don Murray as Bing Hammersmith, the patriarch of a quirky family that included Lucie Arnaz as his eldest daughter Tess. CBS planned to call the show “The Hammersmiths” and pair it with Murray’s previous series, “Knots Landing,” on Thursdays, but when Fox shifted its red-hot “The Simpsons” to that night, CBS changed the title to “Sons & Daughters” and shifted it to Fridays. “Sons & Daughters” was set in Portland, Oregon – just like “Monday Mornings.” We’ve come full circle, folks.

What did you watch after “Dallas” on Friday nights? Share your memories in the comments section below.

Who done it?

In “J.R.’s Masterpiece,” we learned Larry Hagman’s iconic character was shot and killed in a Mexican flophouse. The police investigation concluded J.R. was the victim of a burglary, but Bobby told Bum, his brother’s private eye, that J.R. was murdered. Who killed J.R.? Here are some potential suspects.

OLD ENEMIES

Pre-emptive shot?

• Cliff Barnes. As J.R.’s oldest enemy, Cliff (Ken Kercheval) automatically earns a spot on this list, although I’m not sure why he’d want J.R. dead at this point. Cliff is now one of the world’s richest men. He has already beaten the Ewings: Cliff took away J.R.’s company at the end of the old show and recently helped his daughter Pamela seize 10 percent of the new Ewing Energies. Then again, maybe Cliff blames J.R. for the death of his adopted son Frank, who recently fell on his sword after betraying Cliff to J.R. Or could Cliff have killed J.R. to prevent him from rising again?

Waiting to strike?

• Katherine Wentworth. There was no love lost between Katherine (Morgan Brittany), Cliff and Pam’s loony half-sister, and J.R. On the old show, she plotted with him to break up Pam’s marriage to Bobby, whom Katherine wanted for herself. When J.R. betrayed her, Katherine went off the deep end and shot Bobby, then tried to poison him before vanishing. (Pam also dreamed she ran over Bobby with her car, killing him.) Later, Katherine stalked Pam in the hospital after her car crash before resuming her life on the run. Could Katherine have been waiting all this time to spring a trap for her ex-partner-in-crime?

NEW NEMESES

Protecting secrets?

• Harris Ryland. J.R. ordered his private eye Bum to investigate Ryland (Mitch Pileggi), who has caused lots of problems for the Ewings, including blackmailing Sue Ellen. Could Ryland have gotten wind of Bum’s snooping and killed J.R. to prevent him from uncovering his misdeeds? Perhaps, although “Dallas” has been grooming Pileggi as its new villain so it seems unlikely he’ll turn out to be the killer. But what about Ryland’s overprotective mama Judith? She could be a suspect, although if she were going to kill someone, it would probably be a withering glance, not a gun.

Disgruntled dad?

• Mitch Lobell. Lobell (Richard Dillard) was the Ewing family lawyer who helped John Ross and Veronica Martinez trick Bobby into selling Southfork to J.R. When Lobell got greedy and demanded millions of dollars in hush money, J.R. and John Ross blackmailed him with incriminating photos that could’ve sent his son Ricky, a recovering drug user, to jail. After J.R. seized control of the ranch, Lobell vanished without a trace. Has he been hiding in the shadows, waiting for the right moment to take his revenge against J.R.? Perhaps, but if he turned out to be the killer, would anyone remember him?

FRIENEMY

Turncoat?

• Carlos del Sol. Carlos (Castulo Guerra) is a billionaire conservationist and one of J.R.’s old friends. When J.R. wanted to join Cliff’s high-stakes poker game in Las Vegas last season, Carlos agreed to front him the money. He’s also the father of the real Marta del Sol, whose identity was stolen by Veronica, the con artist who helped John Ross in his scheme to defraud Bobby. But isn’t it suspicious that Carlos turned up at the Mexican police station when the Ewings gathered there after J.R.’s murder? Even if he didn’t pull the trigger, something tells me Carlos knows more than he’s letting on.

WILD CARDS

Dead?

• Pam Ewing. At the end of “J.R.’s Masterpiece,” Bum told Christopher that J.R. had been searching for his mother. The backstory: Pam (Victoria Principal) was disfigured in a fiery car crash and ran away from Southfork. Later, the audience learned she had a terminal illness and wanted to spare Bobby and Christopher the pain of having to watch her die. Suppose Pam went into remission and is still alive but, for whatever reason (shame?), doesn’t want to be found? Could she have killed J.R.? It’s extremely doubtful, especially since Pam was such a beloved heroine and Principal recently announced she won’t reprise the role.

Alive?

• Kristin Shepard. Yes, she’s dead – but when has that ever stopped “Dallas”? Kristin (Mary Crosby) famously shot J.R. in 1980, only to later drown in the Southfork swimming pool. What if she somehow faked her death and went into hiding, waiting for the right moment to try another assassination attempt? Suppose J.R. found out Kristin was still alive and was on her trail? Bum told Christopher that J.R. had been tracking down his mother; what if he was referring to biological mama Kristin and not adopted mom Pam? This is my dream scenario; I don’t expect it to come true. But how cool would it be if it did?

Savior?

• J.R. Ewing. What if J.R. wasn’t murdered? What if his “masterpiece” plan was taking his own life so his death could be pinned on Harris, Cliff or one of his other enemies? I know it appeared someone off camera gunned down J.R. at the end of “The Furious and the Fast.” Could it have been Bum, acting on J.R.’s orders? I don’t love the idea of J.R. killing himself, but I do like the notion of him making a grand sacrifice to save the Ewings from some outside threat. This scenario would also solve the major dilemma with this plot: Who is “big” enough to take down J.R. Ewing – except for maybe J.R. himself?

Who do you think killed J.R.? Share your theories in the comments section below.

Every “Dallas” fan has one thing on their mind: “Who Killed J.R?” Before the mystery is solved, a few other questions must be addressed. Will the answers lead us to one of the eight potential suspects I named earlier this week?

1. Why was J.R. in Mexico? In “J.R.’s Masterpiece,” this week’s “Dallas” episode, we learned our hero was shot and killed in a flophouse in Nuevo Laredo, Mexico. According to the policewoman who investigated the crime, J.R. entered the country to go quail hunting. Later, his private eye Bum (Kevin Page) told Bobby, John Ross and Christopher that the quail hunt was a cover: J.R. was actually following a lead in his scheme to bring down Harris Ryland (Mitch Pileggi), the Texas trucking magnate who specializes in driving the Ewings crazy.

What business would Harris have in a place like Nuevo Laredo? The policewoman told the Ewings that the local drug cartels have started reaching out to “successful businessmen across the border for advice.” Bobby (Patrick Duffy) insisted J.R. would never do business with the cartel, and we don’t doubt him. Harris, on the other hand, might be the type to get mixed up in the illegal drug trade. After all, didn’t he try last season to blackmail Sue Ellen (Linda Gray) into laundering money for him?

2. Why was J.R. looking for Pam? Before J.R. entered Mexico, he went to Abu Dhabi to close an oil deal. But as Bum explained to Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe): “The reason he chose Abu Dhabi was because for the last several months, he’s been trying to find your mother.” Bobby’s stunned reaction: “You mean Pam?” Bum didn’t respond to Bobby; instead, he handed Christopher a document and said, “J.R. thought that once you’d seen this, you’d understand why it’s important for you to find your mama.”

Let’s pause here to remember that Christopher had two mommies: Kristin Shepard (Mary Crosby), his biological mother, who famously shot J.R. in 1980 and later drowned in the Southfork swimming pool, and Pam (Victoria Principal), Bobby’s first wife, with whom Bobby adopted Christopher after Kristin’s death. Assuming Kristin is really dead and that she isn’t the missing mama that J.R. was trailing, the question becomes: Why in heavens would J.R. want to find Pam, his longtime nemesis?

Some theories from Dallas Decoder readers: J.R. figured Pam, who abandoned Bobby and Christopher after she was badly burned in a fiery car crash, is the only person who might be able to talk her brother Cliff Barnes (Ken Kercheval) into finally ending his war against the Ewings. Or perhaps J.R. found evidence that Cliff had somehow bilked an unwitting Pam and/or Christopher out of their rightful share of the fortune they inherited from Pam and Cliff’s rich mother Rebecca Wentworth. (Could such evidence be included in the document that Bum handed Christopher?) Or maybe the aging J.R., seeking immortality, wanted to find Pam because he knew of her ability to dream dead Ewings back to life.

Whatever the reason, if Christopher resumes Uncle J.R.’s search and ends up finding Pam, don’t expect her to look like Principal. Earlier this month, as rumors swirled that Pam might return to “Dallas,” Principal issued a statement suggesting she will never resume the role.

3. Why did J.R. give John Ross a gun? After Bum handed Christopher the document about his mother, he gave John Ross (Josh Henderson) a box that contained J.R.’s gun. It came with this note:

“John Ross, if you’re reading this, it means I’m dead. And if I’m dead, that means Barnes is coming after you. You must crush him before he can win. I promised your Uncle Bobby that taking down Harris Ryland would be my masterpiece. I’d bet my last nickel Barnes will join forces with Ryland to destroy us. Use what I’ve given you to take from them what they want to take from us. When you’ve done that, Bobby will know what to do. And remember: You’re my son, tip to tail.”

Perhaps the most revealing thing about J.R.’s note isn’t his prediction that Cliff and Harris will join forces; it’s that J.R. wrote it in the first place. He knew his life was in danger, although this doesn’t necessarily rule out the theory that J.R. arranged his own death so it could be pinned on one of his enemies. If you buy that theory, you might think this is the gun that was used to kill J.R. But keep in mind: The coroner who examined J.R.’s body said he was killed with a “Saturday night special,” and that’s not the kind of gun John Ross received. On the other hand: Medical examiners on “Dallas” aren’t the most trustworthy people, are they?

4. Who is Lady X? When J.R.’s friend Carlos del Sol (Castulo Guerra) visited Southfork to update the Ewings on the investigation, he explained J.R. met a woman in a club near the hotel where he died. “Not your professional sort of lady, mind you, but there are witnesses to their assignation,” Carlos said. According to the policewoman who accompanied Carlos to the ranch, this mystery woman – let’s call her “Lady X” – asked J.R. to meet her near her workplace, which is how he wound up in the Hotel Colon. A witness saw someone follow J.R. to the hotel, but that person could not be found, the policewoman said.

So who is Lady X? Could she be one of the women I named as suspects earlier this week? Did she intentionally lead J.R. to the hotel, knowing he would be killed there? Did she pull the trigger herself? Does she really exist? Or did Carlos invent her because he’s involved in the killing and wanted to throw the Ewings off his trail?

5. What does Bobby know? Of course, despite what Carlos and the policewoman told the Ewings, we know J.R. was not the victim of a robbery. After Bum distributed J.R.’s “gifts” to John Ross and Christopher, he gave Bobby a sealed envelope. Bobby opened it, read the document it contained and walked out of the room, dismissing John Ross and Christopher’s plea for more information. “This is between my brother and me – for now,” Bobby said.

Outside the room, Bobby told Bum to “pay off whoever you have to pay off so that everybody still thinks J.R. was killed by a mugger. When the time comes, we’ll take care of this ourselves – as a family.” Bobby then walked into J.R.’s room, noticed the framed wedding photograph of J.R. and Sue Ellen, poured himself a glass of bourbon, sat on the bed and said: “I knew you’d have at least one more left up your sleeve, J.R.” He glanced at the document in his hand, half-smiled and continued: “It is a good one. I love you brother.”

So what did Bobby learn? During the “Dallas” cast’s panel discussion last week, Duffy revealed the show’s producers told him who shot J.R. so he would know how to play certain scenes, including this one. So whatever the document reveals, it holds a big clue to the identity of J.R.’s killer. I have my own theory, but for now, I’d rather hear yours. What do you think it says?

What did I miss? Share your “Who Killed J.R.?” theories and wild speculation in the comments section below.

TNT’s latest “Dallas” episode, “Ewings Unite!,” offered a few potential clues in the “Who Killed J.R.?” mystery – but not many. Here’s what I think we know.

• J.R. was searching for Pam. At the end of “J.R.’s Masterpiece,” Bum (Kevin Page) told Bobby, John Ross and Christopher that J.R. had been looking for Christopher’s “mother” before his death. Since Bum didn’t specify which mother, I suggested J.R. wasn’t necessarily on the trail of Pam (Victoria Principal), the mom who adopted Christopher and later abandoned him and Bobby. My left-field theory: J.R. was hunting Christopher’s biological mom Kristin (Mary Crosby). Yes, I know she supposedly drowned in the Southfork swimming pool, but hey, this is “Dallas.”

In “Ewings Unite!,” we seem to receive confirmation that Pam was the target of J.R.’s search after all. This happens when Bobby (Patrick Duffy), while filling in the Ewing cousins on the history of Cliff’s company, holds a stack of papers and says, “This is a summary of the financial reports for Barnes Global, dating all the way back to its inception, when it was started by Cliff’s mother. Now she divided that company up between the three children: Pamela, Cliff and Katherine. Katherine’s dead. So if Pamela’s still alive, she could be a silent partner in Barnes Global. Maybe that’s why J.R. was looking for her – to help us take Cliff down.”

Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe) responds: “If my mother’s alive, I’ll find her. It’s about time I did.”

Bobby’s history lesson isn’t exactly how I remember the origin of the old Barnes/Wentworth empire, but setting that aside for a moment, this scene seems to offer two things: a) confirmation that J.R. was indeed trying to find his old nemesis Pam, and b) Bobby’s theory that J.R. wanted Pam to help him stop Cliff.

In other words: There’s no reason, at this point, to believe Kristin is anything but dead.

• The list of suspects is taking shape. In addition to Kristin, the list I posted last week of eight potential suspects included Katherine (Morgan Brittany), who I figured would want J.R. dead because she’s still holding a grudge against the Ewings. Now that we know Katherine is dead, she comes off the list too. (Presumably Katherine’s demise occurred sometime between the end of the original “Dallas” and the beginning of TNT’s revival.) Is it possible she’s still alive and Bobby doesn’t know it? Sure, but there’s no evidence to support that one either.

I also think we can drop the Ewings’ disgruntled lawyer, Mitch Lobell (Richard Dillard), from the list of suspects, since no one has mentioned him and he was a long shot to begin with. And even though I’m still suspicious of J.R.’s friend Carlos del Sol (Castulo Guerra) – who, we learn in “Ewings Unite!” is investigating Harris’s Mexican trucking operation on Bobby’s behalf – there’s no reason to consider him a suspect at this point either.

This leaves three chief suspects, beginning with Cliff (Ken Kercheval), who wouldn’t seem capable of killing J.R. – until now. In the chilling finale of “Ewings Unite!,” Cliff orders Harris’s henchman Roy Vickers (Alex Fernandez) to blow up the Ewing Energies methane extraction rig – even though Cliff knows the blast might harm his pregnant daughter Pamela (Julie Gonzalo). If Cliff is willing to risk his own flesh and blood, why wouldn’t he be willing to take out J.R.?

The second suspect: Harris (Mitch Pileggi), who joined forces with Cliff in “Ewings Unite!,” just like J.R. predicted in his note to John Ross (Josh Henderson). I still don’t know why Harris would have a beef with J.R., unless he believed getting rid of him would leave Bobby and Ann vulnerable to attack. I doubt the “Dallas” producers will have Harris turn out to be J.R.’s murderer, though, even if his altercation with mother Judith (Judith Light) at the end of “Ewings Unite!” suggests a violent streak.

The third and final suspect: J.R. Yes, I know: It’s unlikely Larry Hagman’s iconic character would arrange his own death, even if it turned out to be part of an elaborate scheme to set up Cliff, Harris or one of his other enemies. But I keep coming back to a point I made last week: Who else on “Dallas” is big enough to take down J.R. Ewing – except J.R. himself?

• There’s still a lot we don’t know. “Ewings Unite!” opens with the reading of J.R.’s will, in which John Ross somehow inherits half of Southfork from Miss Ellie and John Ross and Sue Ellen (Linda Gray) split J.R.’s share of the ranch’s lucrative mineral rights. You might think an inheritance this huge would make John Ross or Sue Ellen suspects in J.R.s death, but c’mon, that would be nuts. The new “Dallas” producers wouldn’t go that far, would they?

“Ewings Unite!” doesn’t shed much light on the other clues in the “Who Killed J.R.?” mystery. In addition to the discovery that J.R. was searching for Pam, “J.R.’s Masterpiece” also ended with Bobby receiving a mysterious document from his deceased brother. In “Ewings Unite!,” John Ross refers to the document as “a letter,” but Bobby declares he won’t reveal its contents until J.R.’s master plan is implemented. “Because that’s the way he wanted it,” Bobby says.

We also still don’t know what to make of the gun that J.R. left for John Ross. While watching “Ewings Unite!,” it occurred to me: Could this be the gun that Kristin used to shoot J.R. all those years ago? If so, might it signal her eventual return? Uh oh, here I go again!

“Dallas’s” latest episode, “Guilt and Innocence,” didn’t offer many new clues in the “Who Killed J.R.?” mystery, but that doesn’t mean we can’t update our initial list of potential suspects. I’ve dropped Mitch Lobell and Carlos del Sol (Richard Dillard, Castulo Guerra) as suspects since each character seems too obscure, along with Kristin Shepard (Mary Crosby), who seems too dead. Of course, any of them could be restored to the list as more clues emerge. I’ve also thrown some new names into the mix and divided everyone into three categories: “more likely” to be responsible for J.R.’s death, “less likely” and “who knows?”

MORE LIKELY

Ewing

• J.R. Ewing. I’ve always felt with few exceptions, there’s only one character in the “Dallas” mythos who is “big” enough to take out J.R. Ewing (Larry Hagman) – and that’s J.R. himself. No one believes he would turn suicidal, but what if he was terminally ill and decided to take advantage of his illness by hiring someone to shoot him, then framing one of his enemies for his “murder?” This might be where Carlos comes into play; maybe the Mexican billionaire helped J.R. pull it off. How do I explain the stunned expression on J.R.’s face before he was shot? I can’t. But I also can’t explain how Miss Ellie managed to take half of Southfork away from Bobby.

Barnes

• Cliff Barnes. Until recently, I wouldn’t have considered Cliff (Ken Kercheval) a likely suspect. He’s too pivotal to “Dallas.” But at the end of last week’s episode, “Ewings Unite!,” Cliff ordered henchman Roy Vickers to blow up the Ewing Energies methane rig, even though it endangered pregnant daughter Pamela, who ended up losing her unborn twins in “Guilt and Innocence.” This is even more heinous than when Cliff made Frank kill himself a few episodes ago. Now that Cliff has become a monster, it’s hard to imagine the show redeeming him. Maybe it won’t bother. Having him turn out to be J.R.’s killer might be the final nail in Cliff’s coffin.

LESS LIKELY

Ryland

• Harris Ryland. Harris (Mitch Pileggi) hates the Ewings, but his ire has always been directed at Bobby and Ann. So why would he want to kill J.R.? Harris offered a clue in “Ewings Unite!” when he tells Vickers, his henchman, that he and Cliff want to “grind the Ewing clan under our boot heels. Now that J.R.’s gone, it’s gotten a whole lot easier.” Still, that doesn’t feel like a strong enough motive to me. There’s also this: “Dallas” has spent a lot of time grooming Pileggi as its new marquee villain, even elevating the actor to the opening credits. What kind of future would Pileggi have on the show if Harris turns out to be J.R.’s murderer?

WHO KNOWS?

Wentworth

• Katherine Wentworth. Yeah, I know. In “Ewings Unite!,” Bobby told Christopher, “Katherine’s dead.” That’s why I’m convinced she isn’t. Think about it: “Dallas” sometimes takes a pretty selective view of its past. (This isn’t always a bad thing.) So for Bobby to mention Katherine – by name – might mean something. One theory: What if Pam died and Katherine (Morgan Brittany) “stole” her identity? Suppose J.R., in his search for Pam, uncovered this scheme, so Katherine killed him to prevent her secret from getting out. Brittany told Dallas Divas Derby she hasn’t had contact with the show’s execs. Doesn’t mean that call won’t eventually come, right?

Gordon

• Dr. David Gordon. At the end of “Guilt and Innocence,” Bobby received an update on the whereabouts of Pam, for whom J.R. was searching before his death. Bobby read the report aloud: “1989, with an unnamed man, presumably her husband, entered Abu Dhabi. Passports expired. No record of future travel.” Could this mystery man be Dr. David Gordon (Josef Rainer), the plastic surgeon who treated Pam after her accident? TV Guide reports “Dallas” will soon bring back Gordon. What if it turns out he married Pam, only to conspire with Cliff to bilk her out of her share of Barnes Global? If J.R. was on to him, could Gordon have killed J.R. to cover his tracks?

Ramos

• Elena Ramos. OK, this one requires explanation. We know the new “Dallas” loves to surprise viewers. I don’t know about you, but I almost never see the show’s twists coming. So what would be more shocking than if J.R.’s killer turned out to be a member of the core cast? I think we can rule out any of the Ewings, as well as Pamela, since she isn’t enough of a daddy’s girl to kill his oldest enemy. But what about Elena (Jordana Brewster)? She has no known motive, but she’s the only current “Dallas” leading lady who hasn’t shot someone yet. (Ann shot Harris, Pamela shot Tommy, Sue Ellen shot J.R. in ’88). Is it time Elena had her turn at the trigger?

Who do you think is responsible for J.R.’s death? Share your speculation in the comments section below and read past posts on Dallas Decoder’s “Who Killed J.R.?” page.

“Dallas” drops tantalizing new clues in the “Who Killed J.R.?” mystery throughout “Let Me In,” the TNT drama’s latest episode. Here’s a look at what we know and what we don’t, along with some more wild speculation.

J.R.’S MASTER PLAN

What we know: In “Let Me In,” Bobby (Patrick Duffy) lets Sue Ellen (Linda Gray) in on a big secret: Before J.R. died, he was devising a master plan against the family’s enemies, Cliff and Harris (Ken Kercheval, Mitch Pileggi). Bobby shows Sue Ellen the evidence that J.R. left behind and gives her a helpful overview of her ex-husband’s scheme. Take it away, Bobby:

“J.R. knew that Cliff and Harris would join forces and come after us. That’s why he wanted us to have this – all pieces to the puzzle of his master plan to take them down, once and for all. Barnes Global financial history. Ryland’s trucking in Mexico. Christopher’s mother’s whereabouts. Somehow it’s all connected. John Ross, Christopher and I are trying to figure it all out. Connect the dots. Finish what J.R. started. We need to find a way to ruin them, before they ruin us.”

What we don’t know: Assuming Bobby is reading the clues correctly, we now know all the pieces belong to the same puzzle. The question is, how do they fit together?

Wild speculation: One Dallas Decoder reader offered a nifty theory last week. We know Pam (Victoria Principal) fled Southfork in 1987 after being disfigured in a fiery car crash. Suppose that incident is part of the conspiracy J.R. stumbled upon before his death? Remember: Pam crashed into a tanker truck. And who on “Dallas” is in the trucking business? Harris Ryland, of course! I have no idea why he would want to harm Pam, but this coincidence is too fun to ignore.

PAM

What we know: After learning Pam was last seen in Abu Dhabi in 1989, Bobby told John Ross and Christopher (Josh Henderson, Jesse Metcalfe) that his contact in the Justice Department is tracking her down but needs more time. Later, John Ross snooped around Pamela’s computer and found a copy of her grandmother Rebecca Wentworth’s will, which John Ross reviewed with Bobby, Sue Ellen and Christopher.

The will shows Rebecca left her estate – including her shares of Barnes Global – to her three children: Katherine, Cliff and Pam. Bobby determined the estate is in a living trust, which means if the Ewings can’t find Pam, Christopher will inherit her shares. “If we can get Pam’s shares, we can kick the legs out from under Cliff. Maybe his entire plan. That’s why J.R. wanted us to find Pam. That’s our move,” Bobby said.

What we don’t know: In a previous episode, we learned Katherine is dead. If this is true, who inherited her third of Barnes Global and why isn’t anyone asking about that? (Or does the living trust arrangement render that point moot? Help me out here, legal eagles.)

Wild speculation: I still like the idea that Katherine (Morgan Brittany) stole Pam’s identity before she died and that this whole thing is going to lead to nutty Ms. Wentworth. It seems unlikely, though, since Brittany recently told Dallas Divas Derby she hasn’t been contacted by the show’s execs. I’m also not sure the Ewings are going to find Pam alive. Given Cliff’s dark nature, isn’t it possible he offed Pam, perhaps in cahoots with her plastic surgeon Dr. David Gordon, who is expected to resurface before this season is over?

Another off-the-wall theory: Instead of bringing back Pam or Katherine, what if “Dallas” revives a member of the Barnes family who’ll be more familiar to today’s audience: Frank Ashkani (Faran Tahir), Cliff’s “adopted” son, who killed himself earlier this season? One Dallas Decoder reader recently suggested the pills Frank swallowed might not have been all that lethal. Could Cliff have conspired with Frank to fake his death so Frank could go to Mexico and kill J.R.?

‘LADY X’

What we know: After J.R.’s death in Nuevo Laredo, a Mexican border town, his friend Carlos del Sol (Castulo Guerra) told the Ewings that J.R. met a woman in a club near the hotel where he died. I previously dubbed this woman “Lady X.” In “Let Me In,” we learn her identity: Rhonda (Emily Kosloski), the club hostess. She tells Bobby that J.R. wanted to ask her about an American who frequented the club, which she said was owned by the local drug cartel. When Bobby showed her a picture of Harris, Rhonda identified him as the American in question.

“What would Ryland be doing with narco traffickers? Is that what his trucks are taking back and forth across the border? Maybe J.R. was on to that,” Bobby said. Carlos responded he would alert the Mexican federales and “let them know there may be a connection between the cartel and Ryland Transport.”

What we don’t know: Are Carlos and Rhonda telling the truth? All along, I’ve suspected Carlos is somehow involved in J.R.’s death. And what should we make of the odd expression on Bobby’s face after Rhonda tells him, “J.R.’s not the first man to invite me back to his hotel room. He just wanted to talk. Share a drink. He was kind to me. Gentlemen are in such short supply where I work. I’m so sorry, what happened to your brother.”

Wild speculation: What if Cliff is the killer and has secretly aligned himself with Carlos, a fellow billionaire, to frame Harris for the crime? Consider this: Why would Cliff, a global titan, need to join forces with Harris, a Texas trucking magnate, to bring down the Ewings? I know Cliff told Harris he wanted to take advantage of Harris’s “muscle” and friendship with the governor, but Cliff has demonstrated he has those kinds of resources and connections himself. Could Cliff be duping Harris?

On the other hand: The Rylands seem to have real connections to the Mexican border. Did you catch the Laredo address on the pill bottle Emma showed John Ross at J.R.’s funeral?

THE GUN AND THE LETTER

What we know: When J.R.’s private eye Bum (Kevin Page) gave Bobby, John Ross and Christopher the evidence that J.R. left behind, the package included a gun, which was accompanied by a letter from J.R. to John Ross. It stated: “Use what I’ve given you to take from them what they want to take from us. When you’ve done that, Bobby will know what to do.”

J.R. also left behind a letter to Bobby, which he refused to discuss with John Ross and Christopher. “This is between my brother and me – for now,” Bobby told them. Privately, Bobby told Bum to “pay off whoever you have to pay off so that everybody still thinks J.R. was killed by a mugger. When the time comes, we’ll take care of this ourselves – as a family.”

What we don’t know: Precious little. I don’t think the letter reveals the identity of J.R.’s killer; otherwise, why isn’t Bobby simply going after that person? Instead, I think the document somehow lets Bobby know that J.R. wasn’t the victim of a random crime. Or perhaps it reveals something else – like maybe some sort of family secret? Recall what Bobby said when he toasted his dead brother after receiving the note: “I knew you’d have at least one more left up your sleeve, J.R. It is a good one. I love you brother.”

Wild speculation: Once again, I return to the theory that J.R. planned his own death. I know a lot of fans don’t like this idea, but it seems like you can use the available evidence to support it. Suppose J.R. knew that he was dying and decided to take advantage of the situation by arranging to have himself shot, then leaving instructions for Bobby – via the letter – to use the gun to frame Cliff, Harris or both for his “murder”? Perhaps Bobby’s last line in his recap for Sue Ellen is telling: “We need to find a way to ruin them, before they ruin us.”

Or hell, maybe it really was Kristin.

Share your thoughts on the latest evidence in the comments section below and read past posts on Dallas Decoder’s “Who Killed J.R.?” page.

This week’s “Dallas” double feature, “A Call to Arms” and “Love and Family,” yielded some new clues in the “Who Killed J.R.?” mystery, along with six new questions:

1. Is Pam really alive? The Ewings’ contact in the Justice Department found a list of deposits being made to a Swiss bank account by Barnes Global. These payments mirrored the payments being made to Pam Ewing’s dormant trust. The Swiss account is linked to someone named “Patricia Barrett,” whose signature matches Pamela Barnes’.

Later, another contact e-mailed Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe) a photo from a Zurich bank surveillance camera that showed Patricia, although the woman’s face was shielded by a big hat. Christopher showed the image to Bobby (Patrick Duffy), who wasn’t sure if it was his ex-wife. “It’s been 24 years since I’ve seen Pam. And then it was after that car accident. She was so badly burned, covered with bandages. I can’t tell. I can’t tell son,” Bobby said.

2. Is Katherine really dead? As Cliff (Ken Kercheval) moved closer to taking over Ewing Energies, he took Pamela (Julia Gonzalo) to lunch and presented her with a pair of emerald earrings. “They belonged to your Aunt Katherine. She willed them to me with the rest of Wentworth Estates,” Cliff said.

Was he telling the truth? On the original “Dallas,” the only thing Katherine (Morgan Brittany) gave Cliff was withering looks. Would she really have left him her estate? What if Cliff, who seems to grow more despicable with each episode, stole Katherine’s share of Barnes Global, along with her jewelry box? Or did Cliff and Katherine patch things up in the years between the old “Dallas” ended and the new one began? Did they set aside their differences and join forces to destroy the Ewings? Could Katherine be the woman in the big hat who calls herself Patricia Barrett?

Yes, I know the woman in the hat doesn’t seem to resemble Brittany. But what if Katherine had plastic surgery and got a new face to go along with her new identity?

3. What’s Pamela really up to? After Cliff gave Pamela the earrings, she persuaded a reluctant Cliff to give her Aunt Katherine’s shares of the company too. “I want to be your partner in Barnes Global,” Pamela explained. Unbeknownst to Cliff, his daughter knows he caused the loss of her unborn twins and has secretly aligned with the Ewings to fight him.

But could Pamela be up to something else too? This is more off-the-wall speculation and it gets a little confusing, but hang with me. Consider: When Christopher’s contact compared Patricia Barrett’s signature to Pam’s, the latter read “Pamela Barnes,” not “Pamela Ewing.” There could be a reasonable explanation for this, of course: After the disfigured Pam fled Southfork in 1987 and divorced Bobby, she could have reverted to her maiden name.

Or what if Pamela – the Julie Gonzalo character, not the Victoria Principal one – is actually the one funneling the money from the dormant trust to the Swiss bank account? Could she be deceiving the Ewings and her father? Is Pamela, not Pam, behind the Patricia Barrett scheme?

This would mean the woman in the big hat in the bank surveillance footage is an accomplice of Pamela, which would explain why the “Pamela Barnes” signature in “A Call to Arms” didn’t look much like the one that Gonzalo’s character signed when she received her annulment papers in “Blame Game.” (In the above image, the “Patricia Barrett” signature is on top, followed by the “Pamela Barnes” signature from “A Call to Arms” in the middle and Pamela’s annulment signature at the bottom.)

4. What’s Harris really up to? Trucks. Mexico. Knockoff designer shoes. Does any of this have anything to do with J.R.’s death?

5. What does Carmen know? Several Dallas Decoder readers say Carmen (Marlene Forte) should be a prime suspect in the “Who Killed J.R.?” mystery. The theory: Cliff, Harris (Mitch Pileggi) or another of J.R.’s enemies has dirt on one of Carmen’s children, Elena or Drew. This enemy blackmailed Carmen into visiting Mexico and shooting J.R.

I’ve always been skeptical of this idea, although there are some clues to support it: In “Blame Game,” the episode where J.R. departs Southfork, Elena mentions Carmen is in Mexico – which is where J.R. died. Meanwhile, in “Love and Family,” when the Ewings watched TV news coverage of the police manhunt for Drew, Carmen said, “I know he’s always been trouble, Mr. Bobby, but he’s not a killer. He would never do such a thing unless he was forced to by other people. Bad people.” Was Carmen speaking from experience?

6. What does Bobby know? When John Ross (Josh Henderson) entered Bobby’s Southfork study in “Love and Family,” the safe was open and Bobby was reading what looked like a handwritten letter, which he discreetly slid under a book upon noticing his nephew’s arrival. Presumably, this is the mysterious document that J.R. left for Bobby. There’s really nothing new here to report, except to wonder anew: What the hell does the letter say?

Share your thoughts on the latest evidence in the comments section below and read past posts on Dallas Decoder’s “Who Killed J.R.?” page.

Throughout the “Who Killed J.R.?” mystery, one thing has nagged at me: Is anyone “big” enough to take down the “Dallas” legend? This is why I never considered characters like Carlos del Sol or Carmen Ramos (Castulo Guerra, Marlene Forte) to be serious suspects. Even Harris Ryland (Mitch Pileggi), as important as he’s become to this franchise, hasn’t earned the “right” to go down in history as the man who murdered J.R. Ewing (Larry Hagman).

Frankly, only one character has enough stature to take out J.R. – and that’s J.R. himself. So during the first few weeks of this storyline, I figured we’d eventually discover our hero was secretly suffering from a terminal illness and arranged his own shooting – perhaps J.R.’s loyal private eye Bum (Kevin Page) pulled the trigger – so that his “murder” could be pinned on one of the Ewings’ enemies.

Many of my fellow “Dallas” diehards found the idea of J.R. taking his own life anathema, and I’ve come around to their way of thinking. Also, if the show went the J.R.-arranges-his-own-death route, it could be perceived as a cop-out – and let’s face it, this franchise already pulled a fast one on the audience when it explained away Bobby’s death as a bad dream. Would the people who make the new “Dallas” want to risk alienating fans again?

For awhile, I also theorized J.R. could’ve been done in by an enemy from his past. My suggestion: What if Kristin Shepard (Mary Crosby) was still alive and returned to finish the job she started in 1980? This idea also turned off a lot of fans, who suggested it would be the ultimate retread: It would turn “Who Killed J.R.?” into “Who Shot J.R.?” all over again, right down to the same assailant. I see their point, but I still think it would be cool.

The other great choice from the “old enemies” camp would be Katherine Wentworth (Morgan Brittany), especially if it turned out she faked her death and stole Pam’s identity. I also love the idea that Katherine is somehow connected to Harris, and that she used a Ryland Transport truck to orchestrate the car accident that disfigured Pam and prompted her to flee Southfork in the first place. What a twist that would be! Unfortunately, based on recent comments from Brittany and “Dallas” producer Cynthia Cidre, it doesn’t sound as if Katherine will be returning to the show anytime soon.

This leaves one viable suspect as J.R.’s killer: Cliff Barnes (Ken Kercheval). Think about it: Cliff has become a pretty soulless figure this season. He allowed his “son” Frank Ashkani (Faran Tahir) to kill himself and ordered the bombing of the Ewing Energies rig, even though it put the lives of many people at risk, including his daughter Pamela (Julie Gonzalo), who ended up losing her unborn twins. I have a feeling the worst is yet to come too. Maybe it will turn out Cliff also killed Katherine and somehow kept Pam from returning to Southfork. Perhaps J.R. was about to expose these sins, and that’s why Cliff finally offed his old enemy.

Where does Harris’s Mexican trucking operation and club hostess Rhonda Simmons (Emily Kosloski) fit in? Suppose Carlos and Cliff are in cahoots; Carlos knew his “friend” J.R. was interested in digging into Harris’s past, so he lured J.R. to Nuevo Laredo by leading him to believe Harris was up to something shady south of the border. (Could it be Harris really is transporting nothing more than ugly high heels?) Once J.R. arrived in Nuevo Laredo, Carlos tipped off Cliff, who came to town and shot J.R. (Or maybe Frank isn’t really dead and pulled the trigger on Cliff’s behalf.) Rhonda is part of the scheme and lied to Bobby about Harris’s Nuevo Laredo connection to help Carlos cover his tracks. Before all is said and done, maybe Cliff will even turn on partner-in-crime Harris and try to frame him for J.R.’s death.

Would it be shocking if Cliff turns out to be the killer? No and yes. On the one hand, J.R. is murdered by his oldest adversary? Where’s the surprise in that? On the other hand: Besides Patrick Duffy and Linda Gray, Kercheval is the only original “Dallas” cast member who has a regular presence on the new show. From this standpoint, turning him into a killer would be bold.

Also, consider this: “Who Killed J.R.?” has never been much of a traditional whodunit. From the beginning, this storyline has been about tying up loose ends (“Where in the world is Pam Ewing?”) and settling old scores. Now that J.R. is gone and Cliff has taken control of Ewing Energies, what else is left for him to do?

Besides, it’s not like there isn’t room for a big twist: There’s still the matter of the letter that J.R. left for Bobby. What does it say? Perhaps it will reveal John Ross (Josh Henderson) really is Cliff’s son after all. J.R. faked the paternity test all those years ago to spare his family – and himself – a lot of embarrassment and raised John Ross as his own. This would undoubtedly upset a lot of fans, but it would also add a new shade to J.R.’s character and give new meaning to the famous scene where he holds John Ross for the first time. As for John Ross’s recent nuptials to Pamela, look at it this way: She already married her cousin. Why shouldn’t her brother be next?

I think it’s more likely the letter to Bobby reveals that Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe) is actually J.R.’s son. Perhaps J.R. concealed the truth from Bobby because he knew how much his brother and Pam needed a child of their own. This might explain Bobby’s heartfelt line after he received J.R.’s note after the funeral: “I knew you’d have at least one more left up your sleeve, J.R. It is a good one. I love you brother.”

As for the gun that J.R. left John Ross? Maybe it will turn out to be the gun that Pamela (Julie Gonzalo) used to shoot Tommy and the Ewings will use the weapon as leverage to gain control of Barnes Global. When the Ewings threaten to expose Pamela’s crime, Cliff finally does something selfless and protects his daughter by fessing up to J.R.’s murder, allowing Pamela and John Ross to take control of two-thirds of Barnes Global, with Christopher finally inheriting his mother’s third.

Once the Ewings control Cliff’s company, maybe they can turn Harris out of Ryland Transport, assuming the money Cliff gave Harris last week comes with strings attached to Barnes Global. This might explain J.R.’s cryptic description of the gun in his note to John Ross: “Use what I’ve given you to take from them what they want to take from us.” In other words: They want to take our company from us, so we’ll take theirs from them.

Then again: Knowing this show, there’s a good chance every one of my guesses is wrong. Who knows what twists and turns await us tonight?

Who do you think killed J.R.? Share your final theories in the comments section below and find out during the two-hour “Dallas” season finale, beginning tonight at 9 on TNT.

We now know who killed J.R. Ewing.

In “Legacies,” “Dallas’s” second-season finale, the Ewings completed the execution of the master plan that J.R. (Larry Hagman) devised before his death. All of our questions were finally answered:

• Christopher (Jesse Metcalfe) learned Pam was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and went to Abu Dhabi to receive experimental treatments. The treatments failed and Pam died in 1989, but Cliff (Ken Kercheval) paid her doctor, David Gordon (Sam Anderson), to create the illusion that Pam was still alive so Christopher couldn’t inherit her share of Barnes Global.

• The police nabbed Roy Vickers (Alex Fernandez), but Cliff had him murdered in jail before he could reveal Cliff was the mastermind behind the rig explosion. Meanwhile, the police arrested Harris (Mitch Pileggi) after Emma (Emma Bell) exposed his role in the Mexican drug trafficking. (The high heels were made of cocaine!)

• After John Ross (Josh Henderson) discovered Cliff had flown to Nuevo Laredo before J.R.’s death, he decided Cliff must have killed J.R. Bobby confirmed John Ross’s suspicions and revealed the gun that J.R. left for John Ross actually belonged to Cliff. To make sure the police caught Cliff, John Ross and Pamela (Julie Gonzalo) planted J.R.’s belt buckle in his safe deposit box; when the cops discovered it, J.R.’s body was exhumed and investigators determined the slugs found in his chest cavity came from Cliff’s gun. The Mexican police arrested Cliff and hauled him away.

But wait, there’s more!

Bobby went to see Cliff in the Mexican prison and offered him a deal: Confess to blowing up the rig, having Vickers assassinated and his conspiracy against the Ewings and Bobby would help him. But Cliff didn’t bite. “I have never done anything that the Ewings asked me to do – and I’m not going to start today,” he seethed. As Bobby walked away, Cliff asked him who really killed J.R. Bobby’s response: “You’ll never know, Cliff.”

Cut to J.R.’s gravesite, where John Ross and Christopher persuaded Bobby to finally read the letter that J.R. left him. Here’s what J.R. wrote:

“Bobby, Doctors say I’ve only got a few days left. Damn cancer. I should have told you earlier, but you know how I detest pity. The feud Digger Barnes started with our family caused more heartbreak than either of us has time to recount. Well, I guess you do have the time. Use it. Put an end to this feud, once and for all.

“I had Bum steal Cliff’s gun. That malignant little troll Barnes comes to Mexico every year for a marlin fishing competition. I’m going to damn well stay alive long enough to be here when he arrives. Carlos del Sol will smooth out the rough edges in Mexico for you. And talk to Bum. He’s the final and most important piece of the puzzle. And the best friend I didn’t deserve to have.

“So remember the time that you got grounded for ‘borrowing’ Daddy’s favorite shotgun? You swore up and down it wasn’t you but Daddy said there was no point in lying because he found those extra shells in your room. Well, we both know it was me who planted those shells. Now it’s time to play that card again.

“I can never make up for all the terrible, hurtful things I did to you, Bobby. And I have no excuses either one of us will believe. But I hope in the quiet place in your heart, where the truth lives, that my jealousy – as powerful as it was – was nothing compared to my love for you. Goodbye, baby brother. I guess I’ll be duck hunting with Daddy. I’ll tell him I was the one who borrowed his gun.”

After the letter was read, John Ross asked who actually pulled the trigger. Bum filled in the blanks: “I shot your father, John Ross. He only had a few days left and he asked me to do it. He said that’s the way it had to be. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. Please believe that J.R.’s last act was an act of love. For his family. And for you.”

So for those of you keeping score: Yesterday, I suggested a terminally ill J.R. could have arranged his own death and fingered Bum as the person who pulled the trigger, but I ended up naming Cliff as his most likely assailant.

I should have, uh, stuck to my guns. Because like John Ross told Bum, “The only person who could take down J.R. … was J.R.”

What do you think of the resolution to the “Who Killed J.R.?” mystery? Share your thoughts in the comments section below.

Thanks for the memories

Today is Linda Gray’s birthday. Share your birthday wishes and favorite Sue Ellen memories in the comments section below. Visit Dallas Decoder tomorrow for more Sue Ellen Week posts.

Yes, she did

Next to J.R., Sue Ellen possesses the sharpest tongue at Southfork. (No wonder they got married.) Sue Ellen Week continues with this small sampling of Linda Gray’s most delicious “Dallas” dialogue.

Opposites attract

On Love

• “Sick. Very sick.” (Sue Ellen’s response when J.R. asks her to describe their relationship)

• “Anything that makes you unhappy has got to be good for the rest of the world.” (Responding to J.R.’s anger over Bobby and Pam’s reunion)

• “He’s a man of charm, sensitivity and class. In short, your exact opposite.” (Describing Don Lockwood to J.R.)

Adopt a smirk

On Marriage

• “I’m touched by your concern with children. I’m just sorry you didn’t adopt me instead of marrying me.” (Responding to J.R.’s interest in Lucy’s life)

• “Don’t remind me.” (Responding to J.R.’s announcement that he’ll be home soon)

• “You’re in it.” (Her response when J.R. asks what’s wrong with their bedroom)

Cold shower

• “I hope you have a miserable time today. Because I know I will.” (After J.R. forces her to spend the afternoon with him)

• “Joan of Arc would’ve been a drunk if she’d been married to you.” (Responding to J.R.’s insults about her alcoholism)

• “Why? You feeling particularly dirty these days?” (After J.R. asks if he can join her in the shower)

Night visitor

On Sex

• “I love your sudden urges, J.R. They’re almost as romantic as your daddy’s pit bull.” (Responding to J.R.’s invitation to sleep with him)

• “What other possible use would I have for you?” (After J.R. complains she treated him like a stud service)

• “I know what you like. And I’m sure that wasn’t it.” (After kneeing J.R. in the groin while he’s trying to “seduce” her)

Viper dodger

On J.R.’s Other Women

• “Well, the Winger tramp. Don’t tell me that J.R. let you out of bed long enough to have lunch.” (Greeting Mandy in a restaurant)

• “Oh, is there a convention in town? Or maybe the fleet’s in?” (Responding to J.R.’s statement that Mandy is at work)

• “Modeling? Let me guess: mattresses?” (After J.R. tells her Mandy landed a new modeling gig)

No drama, Mama

• “Cutting you off, you viper!” (After Mandy asks her why she tore up her contract with Valentine Lingerie)

• “You are a very sick little girl.” (Responding to Holly Harwood’s claim that she’s sleeping with J.R.)

• “You’re a very strange and awful woman.” (Taking another swipe at Holly)

• “She’s drama, John Ross.” (Describing Afton Cooper)

Lady of the manor

On Life at Southfork

• “From a shop girl to a wet nurse. That’s a step up.” (After Pam begins caring for John Ross)

• “Next to the Alamo, one of the great battlegrounds of Texas.” (Describing the bedroom she shared with J.R.)

• “Who am I kidding? Telling a Ewing to stop fighting is like telling a horse to grow wings.” (After telling John Ross and Christopher to stop fighting)

Student of success

On Herself

• “I’m a snob, and I can be a witch at times if I don’t get my own way.” (Describing herself to Dusty)

• “Lately I find my own company preferable to almost anybody I know.” (Explaining to J.R. why she wants to be alone)

• “I had a great teacher.” (After J.R. compliments her on her “brilliant” scheme to get rid of Mandy)

What did I miss? Share your favorite bons mots from Sue Ellen in the comments section below.

In 2013, “Dallas” fans said goodbye to several people who contributed to the original series. Here’s a list of those we lost, along with a few notable deaths that occurred among the show’s extended family. Click on each person’s name to learn more about his or her career at IMDb.com.

Deanne Barkley

Died April 2 (age 82)

Barkley wrote “Curiosity Killed the Cat,” a ninth-season episode. She also produced several television movies.

Bruce Baron

Died April 13 (age 63)

In the eighth-season episode “Shattered Dreams,” Baron played the Texan who tried to chat with Sue Ellen and Pam during their visit to Hong Kong. He also headlined several Asian B-movies in the 1980s and ’90s.

Marc Breaux

Died November 19 (age 89)

Breaux is best known as the choreographer of “The Sound of Music” and “Mary Poppins.” He also acted, including appearing in the fourth-season episode “End of the Road, Part 1” as Mark Harrelson, Jordan Lee’s attorney.

Martin Cassidy

Died August 26 (age 75)

Cassidy played Frank Carp, the private detective J.R. hired to learn more about Mandy Winger, in the eighth-season episode “Shadows.” Cassidy also played various roles in four “Knots Landing” episodes in 1983 and 1990.

Linden Chiles

Died May 15 (age 80)

Chiles played Christopher Mainwaring Sr., father of Lucy’s closeted fiancé Kit, in the second-season episode “Royal Marriage.” His other roles include the dad on the acclaimed ’70s family drama “James at 15.” Chiles continued to work until his death; his final role will be in “Road to Paloma,” a film slated for release next year.

Steve Forrest

Died May 18 (age 87)

After starring in the ’70s cop show “S.W.A.T.,” Forrest joined “Dallas” at the end of the 1985-86 “dream season” as mysterious ranch hand Ben Stivers. When Pam woke up, Forrest stayed with the show, except now his character was named Wes Parmalee, who claimed to be the presumed-dead Jock Ewing. Forrest appeared in 15 episodes altogether.

Dan Gerrity

Died November 20 (age 59)

In the 13th-season episode “Sex, Lies and Videotape,” Gerrity played Mike, the bartender who served Cliff in the scene where he meets and flirts with Rose McKay. Gerrity also played a maitre’d on “Knots Landing” and became a stage actor in Los Angeles and a public radio journalist in Santa Fe, New Mexico.

Laurence Haddon

Died May 10 (age 91)

Haddon played Franklin Horner, the Ewings’ banker, in 17 episodes from 1980 to 1986. He also played Mitch Ackerman, the doctor who delivered Val’s twins and helped arrange their kidnapping, during “Knots Landing’s” sixth season. The character was named after the production supervisor for “Dallas,” “Knots Landing” and “Falcon Crest.” Haddon was also a regular on “Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman,” playing one of television’s first non-stereotypical gay men.

Julie Harris

Died August 24 (age 87)

Harris, the most celebrated actress in Broadway history, played Lillimae Clements, Lucy Ewing’s other grandmother, on “Knots Landing” from 1980 until 1987. (The 1982 episode “Daniel” briefly reunited her with Larry Hagman, her co-star in the 1959 Broadway production of “The Warm Peninsula.”) Harris received six Tonys, an Oscar nomination and an Emmy nomination during her storied career.

Jane Kean

Died November 26 (age 90)

In the third-season episode “Mastectomy, Part 1,” Kean played Mitzi, the waitress at the diner where Sue Ellen and Dusty Farlow have a secret rendezvous. Kean is probably best known as Joyce Randolph’s replacement in “The Honeymooners” revivals of the 1960s and ’70s. She also did two guest spots on the David Jacobs-produced ’80s western “Paradise.”

Dudley Knight

Died June 27 (age 73)

Knight played the Dallas hotel shop manager where Val signed copies of “Capricorn Crude” in “New Beginnings,” the fourth-season “Knots Landing” episode that also featured appearances by Hagman, Patrick Duffy and Eric Farlow.

Arthur Malet

Died May 18 (age 85)

During the fifth season, Malet appeared twice as Forest, the Herbert Wentworth loyalist who tipped off Rebecca to Cliff’s embezzlement scheme. The actor returned during the 13th and 14th seasons as Ryan, one of the inmates who befriend J.R. during his stint in the sanitarium.

Paul Mantee

Died November 7 (age 82)

Mantee played Cochran, the Air Force general who told J.R. about Holly Harwood’s contract to supply the military with fuel, in the sixth-season episode “A Ewing is a Ewing.” He later became a regular on “Cagney & Lacey” and “Hunter.”

Shirley Mitchell

Died November 11 (age 94)

Mitchell played the woman who let Jenna into the missing Jack Ewing’s apartment in the ninth-season episode “Twenty-Four Hours.” Mitchell’s career spanned six decades and included guest spots on “I Love Lucy,” “Petticoat Junction,” “Three’s Company,” “CHiPs” and “The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.”

Dale Robertson

Died February 27 (age 89)

During the sixth season, Robertson appeared in five episodes as Frank Crutcher, the first man to court Miss Ellie after Jock’s death. He is best known for his many western roles, including starring in the 1960s television series “Tales of Wells Fargo.” Robertson joined “Dallas” after appearing as a regular during “Dynasty’s” first season.

Mann Rubin

Died October 12 (age 85)

Rubin wrote two episodes of “Knots Landing,” including “New Beginnings,” which drew 21.3 million homes, becoming the most-watched broadcast in the show’s history. (It’s the only “Knots Landing” episode to follow an original episode of “Dallas” on CBS’s Friday night schedule.) Rubin’s TV writing credits date to the 1940s.

Kirk Scott

Died November 16 (age 77)

Scott played Ewing Oil’s public relations chief in the sixth-season episode “Barbecue Three” and one of the private eyes J.R. hired to find Jenna after she jilted Bobby in the eighth-season entry “Déjà Vu.” During Season 13, he made three appearances as Mr. Spangler, the lawyer who executed Atticus Ward’s estate.

Bea Silvern

Died August 23 (age 87)

In the 10th-season episode “The Ten Percent Solution,” Silvern played Senator Dowling’s maid. Two years later, she returned in “Fathers and Other Strangers” as Sarah Ewing, one of the Jews rescued by Jock Ewing during World War II. She was also a regular on “The Secrets of Midland Heights,” one of the Lorimar-produced nighttime soaps of the early ’80s.

Jean Sincere

Died April 3 (age 93)

In 14th-season episode “Heart and Soul,” Sincere played the hotel maid who discovered Johnny Danzig’s dead body. She began her career in the 1940s and continued to perform after she turned 90, including a recurring role on “Glee” as a librarian.

Valentin de Vargas

Died June 10 (age 78)

De Vargas played Patrick Wolfe, the first prosecutor in Jenna Wade’s murder trial, in two eighth-season episodes. His first role was as a Latino student in the “Blackboard Jungle” in 1955.

What do you remember about these artists and their contributions to the “Dallas” franchise? Share your memories in the comments section below.

Stumped?

How much do you remember about the second season of TNT’s “Dallas”? Jog your memory with this quiz. The correct answers appear at the end.

1. Which foursome controls Barnes Global?

a) Bobby, Christopher, Pamela and John Ross

b) Cliff, Christopher, Pamela and John Ross

c) Cliff, Pam, Pamela and Christopher

d) Cliff, Pam, Katherine and Jimmy

2. Which duo owns Southfork?

a) Bobby and Ann

b) Bobby and John Ross

c) Bobby and Christopher

d) Bobby and Gary

3. Match the judges in Column A with the courtroom proceedings they oversaw in Column B.

Column A

I) Judge Leonard Knox

II) Judge Barbara Hirsch

III) Judge Wallace Tate

IV) Judge John R. Testolin

Column B

a) Frank’s arraingment

b) Roy’s arraingment

c) Bobby’s arraingment

d) Ann’s trial

He done it?

4. Where was Cliff when J.R. was killed?

a) In Nuevo Laredo

b) In Cabo San Lucas

c) On his way to the Ewing building

d) Sleeping in his car

5. What did John Ross and Pamela plant in Cliff’s safe deposit box?

a) J.R.’s gun

b) J.R.’s hat

c) J.R.’s belt buckle

d) Jeannie’s bottle

6. Each of these memorable quotes is missing a word. Fill in the blank and state who delivered the line.

a) “Love is for (blank).”

b) “When they figure out how to run a car on (blank), you’ll have the real advantage.”

c) “Once a (blank), always a (blank).”

d) “I’m not a sick, sadistic (blank) like you are.”

7. Match the Ewing Energies executive in Column A with his or her secretary in Column B.

Column A

I) John Ross

II) Christopher

III) Bobby

IV) Sue Ellen

Column B

a) Jill

b) Lisa

c) Sally

d) Stacy

Arrested development

8. When Harris was arrested, what was the charge?

a) Kidnapping

b) Bribery

c) Elder abuse

d) Drug trafficking

9. Who claimed Cliff was in the club on the night J.R. was killed?

a) Rhonda Cummings

b) Rhonda Simmons

c) Rhonda Mason

d) Rhonda Shear

10. Christopher believed his mother was using what alias in Zurich?

a) Andrea Barrett

b) Patricia Barrett

c) Pamela Monahan

d) Jeanne O’Brien

11. What did Emma do to Bo McCabe?

a) She bought drugs from him

b) She kissed him

c) She bit him

d) All of the above

Tables turned

12. What did Sue Ellen use to blackmail Governor McConaughey?

a) Proof that Harris bribed him

b) Proof that he covered up toxic dumping

c) Proof that he covered up the cause of the rig explosion

d) Proof that he ran his brother’s airline into the ground

13. What did Elena learn at the end of the season?

a) J.R. ruined her father’s reputation

b) J.R. caused her father’s death

c) J.R. stole land from her father

d) J.R. had her father arrested

14. Who did Elena go to see in Mexico?

a) Joaquin

b) Heisenberg

c) Carlos del Sol

d) Carlos Danger

15. What were J.R.’s final words during his phone call with John Ross?

a) “You shouldn’t have to pay for my sins.”

b) “I’m proud of you.”

c) “You’re my son, from tip to tail.”

d) “Rosebud.”

Answers: 1) b. 2) b. 3) I. c., II. a., III. d., IV. b. 4) b. 5) c. 6) a. pussies, John Ross; b. bullshit, Ricky Rudd; c. bitch, Valene; d. prick, Ann 7) I. d., II. a., III. c., IV. b. 8) d. 9) b. 10) b. 11) d. 12) c. 13) c. 14) a. 15) c.

How did you do? Share your score in the comments section below and take last year’s quiz.

Ain’t over yet

It’s never too late to start watching “Dallas.” If you missed the original show and the first two seasons of TNT’s sequel series, fear not: This post will tell you everything you need to know before Season 3 begins on Monday, February 24. (*OK, this isn’t really everything that’s happened on “Dallas.” For that, you’ll have to keep reading Dallas Decoder every day.)

The Original Series (1978 to 1991)

In the beginning

Bobby Ewing (Patrick Duffy), the youngest son of a rich oil and cattle clan, marries Pam Barnes (Victoria Principal) and brings her home to Southfork, the Ewing ranch. This upsets everyone, especially Pam’s daddy Digger (David Wayne), who blames Bobby’s daddy Jock (Jim Davis) for stealing his sweetheart, Miss Ellie (Barbara Bel Geddes), and cheating him out of half of Ewing Oil. While Bobby’s devious brother J.R. (Larry Hagman) is building the family empire and catting around, J.R.’s neglected wife Sue Ellen (Linda Gray) becomes an alcoholic and has an affair with Cliff (Ken Kercheval), Pam’s vengeful brother. Later, J.R. and Sue Ellen have a son, John Ross, while Bobby and Pam adopt Christopher, the orphaned child of Sue Ellen’s sister Kristin Shepard (Mary Crosby) and sleazy Jeff Faraday (Art Hindle). Elsewhere, Ray Krebbs, Southfork’s foreman, discovers Jock is his daddy and marries savvy politico Donna Culver (Susan Howard), while Lucy (Charlene Tilton), the daughter of J.R. and Bobby’s middle brother Gary (Ted Shackelford) and his wife Valene (Joan Van Ark), gets engaged to everyone.

End of an era

More drama: Digger dies and so does Jock, leaving Ellie to hold the family together with help from second hubby Clayton Farlow (Howard Keel). Southfork burns down, but the Ewings rebuild it. Cliff hooks up with Afton Cooper (Audrey Landers), who gives birth to their daughter Pamela Rebecca, but Afton refuses to let Cliff near the child because of his fixation with destroying the Ewings. Cliff and Pam’s half-sister Katherine Wentworth (Morgan Brittany) arrives, becomes obsessed with Bobby and tries to kill him, then vanishes under a big hat. Sue Ellen beats the bottle and divorces J.R., while Pam has a bad dream, gets burned in a car crash and runs away. Bobby has an on-again, off-again romance with first love Jenna Wade (Priscilla Beaulieu Presley), who gives birth to their son Lucas and then marries newly divorced Ray. James (Sasha Mitchell), J.R.’s illegitimate son, shows up for a while and emulates the old man. Bobby marries April (Sheree J. Wilson), but she dies. J.R. marries Cally (Cathy Podewell), but she leaves. In the end, Cliff finally takes over Ewing Oil, leaving J.R. alone and suicidal.

Hurts so good

Best Episode: “Swan Song.” The eighth-season finale finds J.R. and Sue Ellen’s marriage on the rocks, unlike the vodka she’s secretly swilling in her bedroom.  Meanwhile, Bobby chooses Pam over Jenna, but crazy Katherine runs him over with her car. The episode ends with the Ewings bidding farewell to Bobby in a deathbed scene that’s so beautifully written and acted, you almost wish it wasn’t part of Pam’s dream. Almost.

Shot in the dark

J.R.’s Greatest Moment: Who shot J.R.? Sure, taking a couple of slugs to the gut is no fun for our hero, but at least he makes billions of dollars in a risky offshore oil deal before he’s gunned down. Oh, and in case you didn’t hear, J.R.’s assailant turns out to be Kristin, his sister-in-law/ex-secretary/ex-mistress, who’s revealed as the shooter in one of the most-watched broadcasts in television history. (Props to Sue Ellen, who figures it all out.)

TNT Season 1 (2012)

When cousins clash

J.R. emerges from a nursing home and tricks Bobby into selling him Southfork so he can tap the ocean of oil flowing beneath it. Like their fathers, John Ross and Christopher (Josh Henderson, Jesse Metcalfe) butt heads, except their rivalry has an added twist: John Ross has fallen for Elena Ramos (Jordana Brewster), who was Christopher’s childhood sweetheart. Christopher marries Rebecca Sutter (Julie Gonzalo), unaware that she’s the daughter of Cliff, who is now the gazillionaire owner of Barnes Global and still hell-bent on destroying the Ewings. Rebecca kills her lover Tommy Sutter (Callard Harris) in self-defense and has Cliff’s henchman Frank Ashkani (Faran Tahir) dispose of the body. Meanwhile, Sue Ellen runs for governor; Bobby’s new wife Ann (Brenda Strong) feels threatened by ex-husband Harris Ryland (Mitch Pileggi), who knows she’s harboring a dark secret; and John Ross, Christopher and Elena form a company, Ewing Energies, but the partnership is threatened when Elena breaks her engagement to John Ross and reunites with Christopher, who dumps the pregnant Rebecca.

Bad does good

Best Episode: “Family Business.” In one of Hagman’s most poignant performances, J.R. learns Bobby is secretly battling cancer and returns Southfork to him, ending the season-long war for the ranch. Later, in a chill-inducing musical montage (set to Johnny Cash’s “The Man Comes Around”), poor Bobby suffers a seizure and Rebecca shoots Tommy, splattering blood over her unborn twins’ stuffed animals. Hmmm. Foreshadow, much?

Pass the torch

J.R.’s Greatest Moment: Who loves J.R.? His son John Ross, who ends the season by gazing at the Dallas skyline with dear old dad and asking him to teach him “every dirty trick” he knows so he can push Christopher and Elena out of Ewing Energies. J.R. beams with pride and tells John Ross that he’s his son “from tip to tail.” Hey, J.R. may have given up the fight for Southfork, but he wasn’t giving up his devious ways — thank goodness.

TNT Season 2 (2013)

All about evil

Rebecca reveals she’s Pamela Rebecca Barnes and hooks up with John Ross. Ann shoots Harris after learning he kidnapped their daughter Emma when she was a baby and sent her to be raised by his control-freak mother, Judith (Judith Light). Ann gets probation, Harris recovers and Judith falls down the stairs. Frank takes the blame for Tommy’s death and kills himself at the request of Cliff, who causes Pamela’s miscarriage. When J.R. is murdered in Mexico, it appears Cliff is the killer, so Bobby, Christopher and newlyweds John Ross and Pamela plant evidence on Cliff to make sure he’s arrested. Oh, and Christopher also discovers Cliff covered up his mom’s death. Elsewhere, John Ross somehow inherits half of Southfork; Sue Ellen loses the election but continues to tangle with Governor McConaughey (Steven Weber); Emma (Emma Bell) sleeps with Elena’s ne’er-do-well brother Drew (Kuno Becker), becomes John Ross’s mistress and turns Harris in to the cops for drug trafficking; and when Christopher dumps Elena, jailbird Cliff asks her to become his proxy at Barnes Global, which the Ewings now control.

Mourning glory

Best Episode: “J.R.’s Masterpiece.” Our hero is laid to rest in an instant-classic hour that brings back several stars from the original series. The highlight: On the night before J.R.’s burial, Sue Ellen takes a heartbreaking tumble off the wagon, then delivers a mesmerizing eulogy for the man she calls “the love of my life.” Can someone please explain how Linda Gray didn’t win an Emmy for this performance?

Only you

J.R.’s Greatest Moment: Who killed J.R.? J.R. did, of course. It turns out he was dying of cancer and arranged his own death so Cliff could be framed for the crime, thus ending the Barnes-Ewing feud … for about 2 minutes, at least. Only a handful of people know the truth, including Bobby, J.R.’s loyal private eye Bum (Kevin Page), Christopher and John Ross, who gets it right when he says, “The only person who could take down J.R. … was J.R.”

What are your favorite “Dallas” memories? What do you want to see happen in Season 3? Share your thoughts in the comments section below.

Fantasy gals

What would “Dallas’s” third season look like if the audience were in charge? Dallas Decoder asked four fans to pick up the storylines where Season 2 left off and describe their fantasy scenarios for the show. Here’s what they came up with.

Such a sneak!

Emma’s Switcheroo

By Chris Donovan

The Ewings celebrate the victory of Ewing Global, then discover they have inherited former Barnes Global enemies, including a dangerous Las Vegas casino family. Bobby employs J.R.’s mercenary (and killer), Bum, to mediate and more.

Elena and Joaquin disprove Cliff’s season-ending claim and Elena turns down the proxy. Instead, she insists on finding Drew and takes mother Carmen with her on her search, the family Ramos leaving in the season premiere.

Cliff picks Pamela’s mother, Afton (a one-time owner of a record company), as the proxy replacement. She begrudgingly complies, hoping to work with her daughter.

Katherine Wentworth, prosecution-immune after 30 years, flies back to appear on a Dallas TV show. She apologizes to Bobby and donates $500,000 to the upcoming Clayton Farlow Charity Rodeo at Southfork. Katherine has it all together now, or does until a blond haired woman shows up at her condo….

The presumed-dead James Beaumont revs up to J.R.’s grave and talks with John Ross.  James has been living in New Zealand since the deaths of his wife and son.

Judith buys her way out of “rehab” and finds her long-lost son, Roscoe “Morrissey” Manley, in a plot to get Harris out of 50-year trafficking sentence. Will she succeed in an installment titled “Switched at Death”?

Ann becomes attracted to her probation worker, Devon Leeman. Will she add a love crime to her rap sheet?

Lucy’s gay twenty-something stepson, Henry Pattemore, is hired by Christopher for the ranch and then matched up by his boss with Sheriff Derrick.

Emma sabotages John Ross and Pamela’s pregnancy efforts by replacing fertility pills with birth control.

In the Sue Ellen stand-alone episode, “Come to Mickey,” Sue Ellen, after passing out at a restaurant playground, meets a 50-year-old Mickey Trotter in her car. Pushing her drunk past in her face (the pregnancy accident, his accident, her breakup with Don), he stops her from driving. She commits to rehab and AA, where she meets her new love interest: Lou, the Ewing attorney.

And Cliff redeems himself in the finale, giving his life for Afton: “Besides my daddy and my sister, you’re the only one I’ve ever loved!”

Donovan, a novelist, is the author of “AWOL.” 

Gettin’ lusty with Dusty

Oh, Annie!

By Andrew H.

The Ewings’ unity in the wake of J.R.’s “masterpiece” to take down Cliff becomes fractured following an environmental calamity on Southfork created by John Ross’s oil exploration. This infuriates Bobby, who sues his nephew.

Emma feels pulled in both directions — a predicament Harris and Judith are more than happy to exploit. Working as Cliff’s secret pawn, Elena unknowingly has a hand in the disaster, but this doesn’t become apparent to her until later, as she remains unaware of the depth to which Cliff is willing to sink the Ewings to achieve his revenge.

As the Ewings become caught up in the Bobby/John Ross legal battle, their romantic liaisons become entangled too. Sue Ellen, fleeing sobriety, begins an affair with Ken Richards, and Ann, feeling neglected by Bobby, finds comfort in the arms of one of Sue Ellen’s old flames: Dusty Farlow.

Distracted by the lawsuit and their affairs, the implementation of Cliff’s diabolical scheme to get even goes largely unnoticed until Pamela discovers it. Irritated by her philandering husband, she must weigh whether to remain loyal to the scattered Ewings or rebuild the Barnes legacy by becoming the final piece in her father’s plan to sabotage the Ewings’ financial holdings and destroy their good name forever.

Andrew, who blogs about food at Cook In/Dine Out, is the creator of the “Dallas Drinks” and “Dallas Desserts” series. He’s also married to Dallas Decoder.

Give ’em hell, honey

Call Her Madam Mayor

By Corina H.

Riddled with guilt, Bum tells Sue Ellen he accidentally sent her the wrong letter from J.R., one he penned before developing cancer, and only realized it when she read it at the burial. Bum reveals the truth about J.R.’s death and gives Sue Ellen the intended letter in which J.R. again professes his love and regret for squandering it, but also says goodbye and urges her to stay strong.

When Sue Ellen confronts the Ewing men about their deception, they dismiss her as emotional and John Ross cites her relapse as an example of how she can’t handle the truth. Heartbroken, Sue Ellen briefly flees Dallas and befriends Vanessa Ruiz (Shannen Doherty), a down-on-her-luck waitress with whom she develops a mother/daughter bond, leaving John Ross feeling threatened.

Back home, Sue Ellen voluntarily enters rehab, where she falls for fellow patient Royce Lee Caine (William Shatner), an eccentric cattle mogul who has J.R.’s power and charm but none of his dastardly ways. With Royce’s encouragement, Sue Ellen gets sober and is elected mayor — only to be challenged anew when Harris is released from jail and sabotages her efforts to aid her constituents after a major tornado.

Back at Southfork, the family takes in Lucy, who is newly divorced and broke. Ray also returns and — to Bobby’s dismay — rekindles his romance with his half-niece. The relationship is strong but challenged from all sides, prompting Lucy to use her Ewing Global shares like a weather vane depending on which family member is hassling her and Ray.

Meanwhile, when John Ross impregnates Emma, Ann is appalled but also secretly thrilled at a second chance at motherhood, which drives a wedge between her and Bobby. Feeling frustrated, Bobby seeks comfort from an old friend who, unbeknownst to him, is put in his path by Judith. Pamela is furious and issues an ultimatum: She’ll allow John Ross this one indiscretion if he ends the affair and Emma terminates the pregnancy. Looking for a distraction, John Ross develops a poker habit, defaults on markers and starts stealing Sue Ellen’s fortune.

Elsewhere, Elena aligns with Cliff and appeals to Sue Ellen’s integrity to try and get Cliff released from jail on false charges, putting the freedom of all involved Ewings at stake. Later, Christopher’s chance encounter with June Leigh Taylor (Jennifer Love Hewitt), a.k.a. “June Bug,” a beautiful farm girl, leaves him wondering: Is it time to give up his stressful career at Ewing Global and start a new life?

Corina, also known as “Team Sue Ellen” on Twitter, writes about her favorite “Dallas” character at FanFiction.net.

Go see daddy

Don’t Forget Cliff!

By James Holmes

Mostly, I want the show to keep on surprising me the way it has done. However, these are things I’d be happy to see more of:

• Cliff in prison. I hope he gets a lot of visitors because I want to hear him talk — about how he ended up as the man he is today, how repentant he is or isn’t for his actions, or just to hear Ken Kercheval find more ways to say “I did not kill J.R.!” — the soap equivalent of Laurence Olivier’s “Is it safe?” mantra in “Marathon Man.”

• Joaquin! We haven’t seen him, we know nothing about him, but after his impressive non-entrance at the end of last season, he’s already my new favorite character.

• Multi-faceted Sue Ellen. We’d seen her be supportive, maternal, shrewd, aloof, devious and drunk before, but not until last year did it occur to anyone that she could be all of those things at the same time. I guess she’ll have to sober up sometime, but I’d love a drunken confrontation with John Ross first.

• I love the glimpses we’ve been given into the parallel “Dallas” that was happening at the same time as the original series — a dyslexic John Ross throwing toys at his mama’s head, the Ewing boys shooting hoops with the McKay brothers — but as well as playing fast and loose with the Ewing mythology, the new show has been able to honor and explain Pam’s convoluted departure in a way the original never could. In “New Dallas,” everything is up for grabs — the past as well as the future. I hope it continues to scramble my brain like this.

• Becky Sutter. I know Frank supposedly killed her off-screen, but is too much to hope she’s still out there somewhere — maybe holed up in a motel watching “Law & Order” reruns?

• Carmen needs to start stirring the mole or get off the pot. Either give her some scenes she can sink her teeth into or kill her off. This half-life is too cruel.

Holmes, also known as “James from London,” is a regular contributor to the SoapChat.net discussion board.

Whose ideas do you like best? Share your thoughts and your own fantasy scenarios in the comments section below.