If the first season of TNT’s “Dallas” taught us anything, it’s this: J.R. Ewing (Larry Hagman) still has a way with words. With “Revelations,” the eagerly awaited season finale two days away, here’s a look back at some of his best lines.
Bullets don’t seem to have much of an effect on him (Photo credit: Mark Seliger/TNT)
• “Son, the courts are for amateurs and the faint of heart.”
Responding to John Ross’s suggestion that he could win a legal fight with Bobby in “Changing of the Guard”
• “Son, never pass up a good chance to shut up.”
Imparting more wisdom to John Ross in “Hedging Your Bets”
• “I hate to hit a man below the belt, but you know I will.”
Threatening Mitch Lobell in “Hedging Your Bets”
• “Time has not been kind to that face.”
Upon seeing Cliff Barnes for the first time in many years in “The Price You Pay”
• “Bullets don’t seem to have much an effect on me, darlin’.”
Greeting a shotgun-wielding Ann in “The Price You Pay”
• “I’m going to tell you the truest thing my daddy ever told me: Nobody gives you power. Real power is something you take.”
Quoting Jock to John Ross in “The Price You Pay”
• “Those people are not passing away because of old age. They’re trying to get away from the food.”
Describing the culinary options at his nursing home in “The Price You Pay”
• “That Mexican girl?”
Describing Elena in “The Last Hurrah”
• “Our girl is crazier than an outhouse rat.”
Describing Marta in “The Last Hurrah”
• “Are you really going to break bread with this lowlife?”
Upon learning Sue Ellen plans to have lunch with Cliff in “The Last Hurrah”
• “Well what fun would I get out of telling you that?”
His response when John Ross asks where he’s going in “Truth and Consequences”
• “For a chance to make money from me, Cliff Barnes would push his mama in a puddle of piranhas.”
Assessing his chances of joining Cliff’s high-stakes poker game in “The Enemy of My Enemy”
• “A cheated man is a dangerous man. Just ask my son.”
Describing Frank Ashkani in “Collateral Damage”
• “OK, I admit, I have lapses where I do wrong now and then.”
Offering Bobby the understatement of a lifetime in “Family Business”
Share your favorite lines from J.R. below. Coming tomorrow: More things Ewings say.
